Fox Mulder has been abducted, and not even Agent Dana Scully can help him out now! He is now at a clinic being treated for ’sex addiction’! But wait the plot gets thicker, so for reliable news of this sort one turns to the Murdoch Express Press! That would be Fox News!

Agent Fox Mulder is addicted to INTERNET PORN and not addicted to sex! Or so say the aliens at the addiction clinic where he has been abducted?

At first I thought, the poor guy… He has been spending hundreds of thousands of dollars on call girls and ordinary prostitutes. He has fallen into the gutter! But it seems that the FBI has merely detected material on Agent Mulder’s hard drive! An excessive amount of it it seems! So aliens working for the Federal Bureau of Investigation (probably at the Roswell office) have abducted Agent Mulder and are now holding him in some X File somewhere hidden away?

We wait for the next episode of this very strange case. Will Agent Mulder come out still alive? Will all his private parts be as before? Stay tuned!