You are here
Home > Posts tagged "Bernie Sanders"

Michael Moore, Nate Silver, Bernie MF Sanders, fake radicals, exit stage right.

OK so the silver lining to watching the Hillary - Trump prizefight is that those cheering and jeering are showing their colors. If they’re on either party bandwagon we can dismiss them out of hand, I'm talking about those pretending to be left of middle. Michael Moore is now out, as usual shepherding for the Dems. Buh-bye. Statistician Nate Sliver, expending his infallible credibility to scaremonger for Hillary, sorry no. Bernie Sanders, thanks for activating a leftist base, but you sold it up the river. Begone now and good riddance. 47996

When court jesters stop laughing at despots they expect you to stop too

They're funny, they're clever, and their comedy can be dead serious, but it turns out when political comedians actually are dead serious they expect their audience to come to heel. Bernie Sanders was just a laugh, look at yourself, you fell for it. Court jesters pile on the ridicule of whoever's the ruler, but when the diversion is over, the joke's on you, now shut up. Said Sarah Silverman to heartbroken Bernie delegates: "Don't be ridiculous." Adds Seth Meyers: "We don't have time for this."

Bernie Sanders packs up his carpetbag revolution. Can you smell the bern?

There is nothing fun about watching Bernie Sanders pack up his carpet bag revolution and embrace the incumbant president. Bernie supporters fell for him like they did Obama and now have to be feeling the blush of embarrassment and pang of hopelessness. What unlookers knew was going to be the ultimate Bern. Except the Bernie dreamers I knew anticipated this all along, but figured it was worth the shot. 47493

Proud to be an American against war, with the exception being this election.

A good friend of mine used to wear this button everywhere. If it wasn't the button, he wore the t-shirt. "Proud to be an American against the war." Tonight he sported a button for BERNIE. Of course he did. We were joking around and he intimated he was not wholly disinclined to favor TRUMP. ME NEITHER, I told him! Trump coud bring down the empire single handed! No need to spark a revolution, Trump would pull a Samson out of sheer egoism! He'd gold plate our drones and they'd be grounded! He'd build a great wall and then we'd have a Great Wall! For tourists of all nationalities! A Great Wall couldn't stop the Huns, even Disney knows that! And reportedly, billionaires are against Trump, so what's the problem? Remember when we'd attend rallies dressed in suits and pretend we were "billionaires" advocating for war or bank bailouts? If billionaires wanted it we were against it. What the One Percent fear, we need! Haha! My friend would prefer Bernie of course, but Trump is definitely his third choice he told me. "Third" I asked? Well, first Bernie, then Hillary naturally, then Trump. OMG WTF.

Oh you are so going to feel the burnie

Remember all those highschoolers and college students activated for Obama 2008, subsequently thoroughly BURNED OUT by the zero yield of Hope or Change for all their effort? It's happening again on campuses across the country and yes it's hard not to celebrate their optimism this time around again, even though they're backing the same corporate party and same promises that have always corraled leftward idealists for the capitalist slaughterhouse. What tragic irony that their catch phrase is "Feel the Bern" because who is going to be feeling that pun ultimately? I'll cheer them on because good intentions should always be rewarded, but I'm going to start calling their candidate BURNIE.

Hillary, Bernie, and Elizabeth Warren

I have read often that it was time for our first woman President (Hillary). As a man I would agree with that. But I would also remind the reader that Lizzie Borden was a woman and we know how that worked out for her parents, when she hacked them to pieces with an axe. 45438

Bernie Sanders Hope and Change 2.016

YOU'RE WELCOME. The same civic dutyists activated by Obama 2008 are already in the trenches for Bernie, making no apologies, showing no insight about the nowhere they delivered voters the first time around. In effect, the Obama deadheads have found a new phishy bandwagon, and it reeks of the same neoliberal speciousness. Who would have thought an old white guy would be the new hope change candidate? Bernie Sanders is the Democratic Party, itself the good-cop half of the corporate capitalist imperialist machine. Bernie didn't "win" the Democratic candidate debate, the winner was the Democratic Party, which came off favorably compared to the lunatic GOP. These days the GOP is condemned by whoever is showrunning Election 2016 to play the bogeyman to the lesser of lessers. Cue Bernie Sanders. Though he talks a great game, he's never walked it. Bernie wants a political revolution, but it's a counter-revolution in populist clothing.

Bernie Sanders declares candidacy for ceremonial Dennis Kucinich stand-in role passed up by Elizabeth Warren

Bernie Sanders is not running for president. Everybody's favorite independent socialist gay short person politician is rising to the occasion where Elizabeth Warren would not. Hillary's foil cannot be a woman, it has to be an unelectable white man. Dennis Kucinich was the perennial go nowhere boy candidate whose task was to pretend his challenge skewed the Democratic party platform to the left. At best Kucinish raised populist issues which the leading contenders then could not avoid. In practice Kucinich stole just enough enthusiasm from independent voters to preempt the impetus to build a third party. So now it's Bernie's turn.

Top