“Safe Cigarettes” (from an ad on my email sidebar)

So, I don’t click the ad. It starts with “medical research develops a cigarette that doesn’t Kill you”

Nice of the Tobacco companies to admit their product is a Death Machine.

That is, assuming it’s not bait to bring the smokers in to a website that offers the following stats…

Cigarettes burn at higher than 451 degrees F.
That’s a given, because the paper has to stay smoldering.

The smoke therefore is a hundred degrees F, 38 degrees C, hotter than the temperature you’d set your oven to cook a roast.

Fact #2, there are in your lungs little tiny moist cells which have one purpose in their collective life, alveali.

The little dudes have to transfer Oxygen from the air you breathe in to your bloodstream, thus your entire-rest-of-the-body doesn’t die… and transfer out the toxic Carbon Dioxide.

These little dudes will last your entire lifetime. Because when the last alveoli die, you die.

They work splendidly if a few conditions are met.

One is that you don’t inhale poisons.

Most poisons are filtered by the mucous membrane, further up in the mouth, nose and throat.
and in tiny hair-like structures called cilia. Strangely, when you apply smoke that’s hot enough to cook a steak directly to these protective structures, they die.
The mucous dies and dries up.

Your lungs in an attempt to get some clean air gasp deeper and deeper.

Driving the toxic smoke down deeper and drying up more of the alveoli and scarring them once they don’t have their protective moisture to, well, PROTECT them.

You have less and less ability to transfer the poison out and the Life in. Because as you’re pushing poison out, you’re also pushing poison IN. Hot poison. Hot enough to cook a steak poison.

THEN… there’s the nature of why you smoke in the first Damned place.

It’s because you’re addicted to the toxins. Especially nicotine.

Nicotine not good. Nicotine REAL BAD.

It has medicinal uses, native herb-lore has quite a few of them, like a poultice for insect stings. Smoking a pipe of it once or twice a day doesn’t compare to smoking it 20 times or more a day.

Really, seriously, unless you got a mosquito bite inside your lungs there’s not much reason to apply nicotine to the alveoli.

If they were to ever make a non-toxic cigarette, there would be no reason for anybody to smoke it.

Aside from a certain infantile instinct to put things in your mouth.

So, when you see the ad, think about it…

For all I know the link target will be to a web page that says “What, did you SERIOUSLY expect there to be such a thing as a “safe” cigarette? Click here to get help quitting…”

Your alveoli will thank you.

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Brother Jonah

About Brother Jonah

Recovering Texan. Christian while and at the same time Anarchist. (like Tolstoy only without the beard, for now) Constantly on the lookout for things which have relevance to things I already know. Autistic. Proud to be Ex- air force. Out of the killing machine for 27 years 4 months and 5 days woohoo!
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1 Response to “Safe Cigarettes” (from an ad on my email sidebar)

  1. Electronic Cigarettes. The flash-player “Click here” ad had that much added in.

    A cigarette with electrodes perhaps, tingling his taste buds, etc… to give the illusion of having his lungs burned up.

    Still not a solution. We’re not born with an instinct to inhale hot toxic substances, we actually have to be TAUGHT to do it. Usually… ok ALL the time it’s taught by people who are going to make money if you take up the habit.

    The simple solution would be to stop Teaching The Habit of Burning Yourself From The Inside.

    Of course, then the Tobacco merchants would have to find real jobs. Doesn’t seem like they’ll want that option.

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