New VIP consular services in Pakistan

The next time you need consular help oversees and you’re made to take a number, you know the US of A can do better than that. I’m fairly enthused about the US consular services plan unveiled to spring undiplomat Raymond Davis from Pakistani jail. If a plea for diplomatic immunity fails, because you’re a CIA operative for instance, try a bribe of millions to the victims’ survivors, wrapped in US Green Cards. Why deny those impulses to shoot your impertinent foreign hosts, in the back as they flee when it’s safest, or by surprise at point blank range? Fire a dozen bullets, none of them misses, leaving crowds of onlookers mouth-agape thinking you’re MF Bourne. A consular vehicle can rush to your rescue, plowing through motorcyclists in its path. Don’t worry, US drivers will be airlifted before local authorities can learn their identities. In the meantime you won’t languish in jail for long, even with half of Pakistan taking to the streets expecting their government to uphold the law.