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BBC: Vuvuzelas banned at many FutBol matches…

"Because they might be considered a WEAPON" And aside from that racist gratuitous raising of the Terrorist Specter out of its uneasy grave, there's the notion that it would make it where the people wouldn't hear public service safety messages. Unlike, of course, a large rowdy and NOISY crowd of the European version of Rednecks screaming, hollering and other activities which are usually the accompaniment to Drinking A Lot Of Alcohol. Those could never in any way drown out Public Safety Announcements, no sir!A growing number of Premier League clubs are following Tottenham's lead and banning vuvuzelas from their grounds on match days this season. Arsenal, Birmingham, Everton, Fulham and West Ham are the latest teams to have stated the plastic horns will not be allowed inside stadia. But they'll still sell English Beer, which is multiple times the strength of anything you'll find on the shelves in America. Drinking a quart of it could be equivalent to drinking a fifth of 80-proof whiskey. 30% alcohol content isn't the norm, but it's in the range of what's sold. And 30% = 60 proof, proof is double the percentage of alcohol by volume. Americans wouldn't be in the habit of making the mental conversions because here it's mostly used in relation to DISTILLED spirits rather than brewed. Many more Americans need to take in at least one AA meeting because that's who teach people what their drinking habits actually amount to. "but it's ONLY beer!" A lot of Brits need the Friendship of Bill W. as well. I shan't even mention Irish because that's just too easy.

FIFA vuvuzela horns may prove to be thin-skinned America’s best friend

Gearing up for Saturday's World Cup match between the USA and Ghana, media talking heads are already preparing US viewers for the home field advantage that will favor the remaining African team in contention. Convenient actually, because by chance our A-Team is booed in any arena it sets its invader's foot. The now maligned South African horns have so far masked a third world animosity that might put most Americans over the edge. The nerve of those ingrates, to boo, hiss and whistle the emperor's freedomTM fighters?

Soccer offsides rule is agreement not to score behind your opponent’s back

The US pretends the International Criminal Court doesn't have jurisdiction over its war crimes, and thinks the same immunity should shield us from FIFA referees I guess.   The USA-Algeria match today was hard fought, admittedly team USA displayed an offensive edge. Rooting for Team Weasel Empire doesn't automatically make you a Nazi, but I'll be curious to hear firsthand accounts of the hostility our compatriots faced in the stands. The silver lining to a US victory is that eventually our sportscasters will have to apologize to American TV viewers about the constant booing whenever USA gets the ball. Vuvuzelas may turn out to be a fortuitous annoyance for Western broadcasters. They mask the dynamics of how the spectators are really responding. I was slow to realize what I was hearing during the USA-Algeria match, a consistent switch from boos to cheers whenever the ball changed hands. I'm surprised I didn't see more commentary about it. Honestly, the TV talking heads spoke of the US supporter presence being "huge," and didn't bat an eye at the eruption of disapproval when Landon Donovan scored the last minute goal to net a USA victory. The next match pits the US against Ghana, which sets up a plausible excuse for why the entire stadium will be cheering against the USA. Much as I'd like to see an African team advance, I hope the Americans survive, because the more American stateside see our athletes jeered and booed, the sooner our sorry imperialist swagger can face abrupt self-reflection. Eduardo Galeano's SOCCER IN SUN AND SHADOW offers a great explanation of the Offsides Rule. Simply put, it reflects the gentleman's agreement not to go behind your adversary's back. What sport is there to kicking at an unprotected goal?

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